Non-shiny

Argh! Maybe I am throwing a massive hormone-fit but what is with the Plan Changers?
You know the people that decide that they are going to take the current plan and throw it out to suit their needs? If an event of any sort is set then don't go switching it around to please yourself. If the date is inconvenient, then DON'T GO! Don't ask people, whether it be a bride and groom or a book club, to change everything around so that it is less hectic for you. If a group has plans to go on a camping trip and you get invited, don't suddenly ask to go somewhere else because you heard it was better/different/closer/whatever. Just plan your own damn trip and save the group your hassles.
Please take my little piece of advice and be a good friend to those around you. If you want to be at an event, then make it happen. If something more important is happening on that date then that really sucks, but that is life. Send your regrets like a normal person who was raised to be respectful of other people's time. If you're really that important to the event then your friends or family will work to accommodate you. If you're not then feel free to blog about it.

Mental Stimulation

I seem to have had a lot of really good conversations lately. The very best being with my great friend Stacy. We had a wonderful give and take over a book that it seems everyone has read, Twilight. Of course we occasionally veered into drooling over the werewolves in the next movie, but we had a lot of fun discussing character motives and sympathetic protagonists, sticky plot points and hidden agendas. It was a real, grown-up conversation that never touched on children, which is rare for two mothers. And I loved it.
I have been having so much fun lately discussing everything from books to the current economic situation in relation to Japan in the 90s to recycling viability in my community. Since having Killian almost two (TWO?!) years ago I rarely have a conversation that doesn't at least include him, if not center around him. I hate it sometimes and I try very hard to separate "Katy" from "Mom" but since we are the same person the lines are often blurred. How can I have a discussion about the sorry state of the public school system without relating it to what my son's experience will be? But slowly but surely I am gaining ground in the "Katy" version of me. Because I sure do miss being a real person with thoughts and ideas about something other than daycare and child rearing!
One of my biggest pet peeves is when I ask a woman/mother "How are you?" and the reply is "Oh, well Johnny has had diarrhea." Or some such nonsense. First, I didn't ask how Johnny's diaper looked this morning, I asked about YOU. Remember, my friend? The funny, witty person with opinions about the world and a great fashion sense. I fear that people will ask that about me when I am drowning in two kids.
I know that the first year or so of having a baby it is all child-centered and I hope I make peace with that this time around. But after that maybe I will find a way to concentrate on something more than one book a month read for my book club. I hope that there is light at the end of the infant tunnel where there is room in my brain for more than colic cures and breast-feeding positions!
Because I discovered so much during that Sunday afternoon conversation. About a favorite book, a favorite friend and even myself. And it was great not being so "mommed out" for an hour or so.

Follow the Motto

A wise woman once said, "Don't be a dick". I have heard my dear friend say this on numerous occasions and I always laughed and agreed but I have recently started to hear it reverberating through my head like an 80's pop song featuring too much electric keyboard. I decided to take my own advice and set out on a spiritual journey to not be a dick. I am finding it harder than I would have thought.
When I want to get on the freeway by my house I usually stay in the far lane, speed past all the cars waiting for their turn to get into the turning lane, then I jump ahead of some slow person and steal their turn to enter the freeway. I'm sure this saves me very little, if any, time but I like to get places NOW. I realize that this isn't exactly following the motto. So instead I tried to follow the motto and wait my turn. Well that didn't go much better. I ended up screaming at the lady in front of me that wouldn't just turn! Granted she couldn't hear me but my blood pressure and son both got the gist of what I was saying. Follow the motto....even if no one else will see you breaking it.
My reasons for undertaking this arduous path are numerous. I heard the saying recently "Keep the shiny side up." It was referring to a motorcycle but in that weird way that things tend to do, it really struck me. What a great life motto! I suddenly saw all the many ways that I had failed to keep the shiny side up and how I could apply my newfound mantra to all facets of my life. In friendships I should work more on keeping my shiny side up. I know my marriage could benefit from a shiny Katy. And my son could probably stand to see me smile a little more and scream at other drivers in an erratic fit of road rage a little less.
So now I am following the motto. Or trying to. I hope that all around me will benefit from this experiment and I really hope it will help me cope with those third trimester mood swings!